Tuesday, March 9

story time.

my husband...

...has this habit of watching a movie, every night, before we go to bed.
about 95% of the time we fall asleep before the movie is over.
and every night i usually get into bed about 15 minutes after him.
{i have to put my anti-wrinkle cream on just right, it takes time and skill}
by the time i get into bed, the previews are over and he's pushing the play button.

and then i always ask, "did you turn the sleeper on?"
9 times out of 10 he says, "no." in a sleepy, grumpy voice.

every now and again i stay up much later than him....
by an hour or two...
just caught up in whatever i'm doing.
{which usually involves fb, twitter or blogging}
but these nights are always the most entertaining for me.


he still puts a movie in.
and because i wasn't there to remind him to put the sleep timer on,
he doesn't do it.
so when his movie ends and he's fast asleep,
i'm the lucky soul who gets to listen to the song on the menu screen
of the DVD for 30-45 minutes...
until i decide to get up, turn it off and go to bed.
after nights like this, my dreams are plagued with the song.

my husband USED to have a snoring problem.
but after being elbowed, kicked, shoved, and shaken repeatedly
to halt the earth shaking snores mid-sleep, he seems to be cured.
except on these nights.
i'm not sure if it's because i'm not actually in the bed with him
and he's subconsciously aware of the fact that he's not an
arms length distance from me and will most likely be able to get away
 with his hurricane snores without consequence???
who knows.
but... i do know that it sounds like he's swallowing
all our furniture and possibly, himself.
yet, when i breech our bedroom door
i somehow always find him and our furniture all in one piece.
quite the enigma.

when i do finally go to bed, he usually mumbles something to me in his sleep.
here are a few of things i've heard upon sliding into my sheets...

"Not like that you won't."
"njknoainwfnoanvac.... no."
"That's not what I said."
"Let's go this way."
"Tell me you love me."

can't live with him...
can't live without him.



it's just me said...

This is adorable x cute x a million.

Sam said...

You need a remote control.

Cortney said...

This was quite the funny story. So glad my husband doesn't snore, only one occasion does it happen.

des said...

oh the snoring spouse... to be a newlywed again!

brizz said...

Is the remote control for turning the DVD off??

Or turning Brandon's snoring/sleep talking off/down??

Either way... I think you're right.

The Cotton's said...

hahahaha! Chris totally says the same kind of things to me!